snug 'em up

At school, I often see boys wearing loose, almost comically huge pants. The crotches hang down to mid-thigh and leave everything to the imagination because there's nothing but fabric. Granted, I probably shouldn't be looking at boys that would wear something so unflattering (or boys at all, if we're going to be honest), those that may still cling to the rave wear of the mid-'90s, but still... It's really solidified my resolve that tight pants are the way to go.

I mean, seriously, no one looks particularly good in baggy jeans. I know boys wear that sort of thing to either hide their skinny legs or to store supplies for the winter, but it doesn't make it right. Remember that scene in "Clueless" with the back shot of a row of boys dressed abominably? Bad look then, bad look now.

It really makes sense that I have an affinity for tight jeans. Look at the facts:
1) I liked metal as a preteen (in addition to Duran Duran, who often wore snug-fitting pants and white jazz shoes, a look I can't explain yet still find charming) and all those metal boys wore tight, children-preventing jeans.
2) You already know I have a thing for male ballet dancers' tights and cups. Doesn't it make sense I would want to see variations of that at all times?
3) With no hips and straight legs, most boys have the types of bodies that can wear skinny jeans, which means they should wear skinny jeans if they can. Right?

Now that I think about it, skinny jeans are the metal jeans of the '80s. Which reminds me... I saw an ad for a new reality show where Bret Michaels from Poison makes out/fucks a bunch of rocker chicks. Looks dreadful, so I obviously have to watch it, if only to feel superior for a moment.

Also, I can't stop listening to Destroyer's "Foam Hands." It makes me think of OMD for some reason, though they really sound nothing alike and even if Dan's song had the addition of electronics it wouldn't sound even close to similar. I can't explain the connection, but it's there.